mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Uh, yeah.

So I finally finished "Starchild." Since it had its own tag here on DW I figure I'd better mention that it's done even though I suspect anyone who did care stopped caring three years ago.

Basically, I kept waffling on the ending.

Ending spoilers. )

Original character endings for the pilots )

mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Took a stab at the ending-sentence meme the rest of y'all are doing and realized a few 'fics in I end things with dark/light imagery waaaaay too often. C'est la vie.

Anyway, how 'bout this: closing sentences to WIPs I would rather like to finish some day?

Stuff. Spoilers for 'fic that may not get published, in a sense. )

The last of these being a piece of period-appropriate sentimentalism IMO.

mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
A compendium of hypotheses on why Renais Twins!Mom is so absent the kids never even mention her despite this being a franchise that reveres heroic parental units and especially mommies.

1) She died in childbirth (because twins) and Fado, like Teddy Roosevelt, never mentioned her again. The twins don't even think about her.

2) Sloppy scripting.

3) Fado, like Eph, was "reckless" in his youth and knocked up some random village girl who sent the twins to court but refused to show up herself.

4) Since Renais is a sexist place, as we have determined elsewhere, the princess of Renais donned a false beard and passed herself off as a warrior king. Nobody asked too many questions about the twins 'cause nobody wanted to know.

5) TwinsMom got bored with Fado and ran off with a charismatic traveling monster hunter who turned out to be an imperial prince of Rausten. They had L'Arachel together and died hunting monsters; Fado kept quiet about the whole business to avoid a war and the entire subject of TwinsMom was taboo. Then Ephraim married L'Arachel and oh noes DEMONSPAWN.

I'm down with Option #5. :)
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)

When I first tried to get into Fire Emblem a long, long time ago, I thought that a certain golden-haired sniper was the source of the "dropped a Bridget on him" trope.  I thought FE4's "Bridget" was a dude and a trap.  I also found the very existence of this dude-trap character with the flowing hair and ugly face to be incomprehensible.  

Then I found the real Bridget and it made a LOT more sense to me.


Also, ever since seeing those deleted scenes from FE4 I have not been able to get the plotbunny of Corple dealing with his kooky stepmother Patty out of my head.  Must... resist...
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
During a long drive in the car yesterday, I remembered one of the first media forms I had extensive "headcanon" for.

The Baby-sitters Club.


And it was as wacky as the headcanon of any ten-year-old, I'm sure.


You know, I'd never quite recognized until now that Delmud actually has NO "predestined" lover in FE4.  None.  I'd always noted in the back of my head that there wasn't an "ideal" pairing for him, but it never sank in that there wasn't even some offbeat underused pairing lurking in the script, his equivalent to Scathach/Lana.  Huh.  And there's no sketchy late-game sibling conversations either (hi, Arthur and Tinny), because Nanna has Aless to be sketchy with.

I'm guessing the developers forgot about him, but the upshot is that Lachy's charismatic son has worse luck with the ladies than Corple.  From a meta level I have to wonder if Del didn't realize that hooking up with random people on the battlefield when you're a hormone-charged teen is not actually a path to happiness and fulfillment.  He'd certainly have cause to be skeptical.
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Some holiday crackfic for [personal profile] raphiael

Letters to Holsety

I do not own Fire Emblem or any of its characters.


Crackfic under the cut )


mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
These are not the big, meaningful headscratchers or Deep Meta wibbles. Nothing like, "Is Ethnia the Earth Goddess of Thracia a renegade, people-friendly Earth Dragon?"

mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Hacks.  Some are simple-- let's raise stat caps to 30 in FE5!  Let's update the FE4 mug shots to Thracia 776 style!  Screw the Jugdral gang, let's have Marth's crew in FE4!  Some are... really, really weird.

When I first learned of hacks of FE4 retooled to "star" Ayra, Tiltyu, and such, they seemed kind of masturbatory to me.  Would I want to play a whole game centered around Tiltyu and her kid?  Ah, NO.  Then I did some digging and learned how truly whacked they are.  The "Pimp Daddy Levin" hack Ammie made is intuitive compared with some of these.  And since these are hacks and not fanfiction, they operate under some weird constraints in spite of the bizarro custom classes and stat changes-- characters literally replace characters from actual FE4, one to one.  Gender-swapped characters get the death scream of the original character-- so, if you put Azel where Aideen is supposed to be, Azel ought to scream like a girl if he dies.

A brief overview!

Genealogy of Ayra:  Stars Ayra.  OK.  But there's a twist-- there are only nine male characters, each of them with a fixed set of kids assigned to them.  Azel replaces Aideen, Finn replaces Ayra, and so on.  Lex replaces Dierdre.  The ladies get to match up with the handful of dudes.  OK.  But it gets weirder!  How weird?  Well... how about Leaf being a Gen1 character alongside the likes of Lex and Azel?  How about Levin with no holy blood at all, and Fury as the major Holsety carrier?  How about FE5 exclusives like Karin and Miranda mucking it up with Gen 1?  How about Pegasus Knight Sety?  No, really.  This game also features non-evil kawaii Julius and a blue-haired Nanna and Delmud.  With automatic minor Dain blood.  Yeah.  And Arion's a dancer.  Sprites are redone, too.

Getting a feel for how bizarre this is?  Like, Trabant replaces Sylvia, so he's likely to fall for Fury, who replaces Levin, so you have to be careful to make sure Princess Fury hooks up with Levin, who's the replacement for Fury.  @_@

Oh, and characters you think of as "good," like Claude and Kurth, show up as bad guys.  In case you wondered where they fit in the equation.  A large theme of these hacks tend to be Sigurd and Cuan and such as Bad Dudes.  And evil Dierdre.

Genealogy of Tordo: The Tiltyu show.  The opening sequence linked here should give you an idea of the weird going on.  Tiltyu and her loyal peeps Rinehart, Ovo, and Muhammad set out to rescue Lady, uh, Laylea of Jungby.  And Tiltyu's tactician appears to be about seven years old.  No wonder they all die.  Here's some more of it, from Chapter 5; looks like Levin and SomeChick, I mean Ethnya, are the Cuan and Ethlin of this game.  Here's the pairing guide.  One hallmark of this is the custom classes and bizarre weapons.  Sylpheed?  Espions?  Lindwurms?  Is this Pokemon?

More pairing discussion here.  There seems to be a continuation of this hack, or an update, or something, called Revolution.

Genalogy of Narga: Stars Kurth.  Focuses on his generation, which means you pair up "senior citizens," apparently.   This grosses some people out.  Here's a hint-- Reptor replaces Ethlin.  Langobalt replaces Lachesis.  Turned on yet?

ETA: Videos on Nico Nico proved that rumors of septuagenarian love are entirely true, and I don't understand wtf is going on in this hack.  One of the videos I watched showed Leaf and Altenna holed up in their evil den of evil before sending Finn-- first gen Finn-- out to apparently engage and trash Arion in an NPC battle, which made Trabant and a bunch of other characters upset.  Said other characters appeared to be Queen Rahna and one of Levin's uncles, or maybe it was the guy who shares a portrait with Levin's uncle and the chick who keeps magic axes in the lake of Verdane.  You've got me.  I don't think any amount of FE4/5 knowledge can make sense of this one; it's going on its own terms.

Genealogy of Fala: Stars Alvis!  I wanted to play this one because A) Alvis and B) I hear it really, really warps one's view of canon FE4.  But it's not translated so I wouldn't grok it anyway, and the hack was never completed.   Still, it sounds promising.  Alvis sets out accompanied by his fine lady companions Aida and Vaha, shortly to be joined by dear brother Azel, Azel's wife Tiltyu, and their little apprentice Olwen.  Etc.  This one, like the Ayra game, has a genderswap theme wherein the kids are fixed to a small number of father characters, which means most of the Gen1 cast is female.  Including genderswap Ardan.  Really.  Upside?  Playable Eltoshan.  Downside?  Playable Langobalt.  He breeds in this one, too.

There are many more-- a version starring Lex, ones that focus more on stats and such instead of sweeping plot and characterization changes.  And of course there are many hacks of other games.  But these FE4 ones sound like daft, daft fun, at least for one playthrough.  Too bad I can't read a word of it, but I did get a Nico Nico account so I could watch the Genealogy of Ayra playthrough there.

ETA: Genealogy of Neir.  The adventures of Lex and his son Arthur, appropriately daft.  Lots of Asvel.  And... female Eltoshan.
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
I just realized how bad FE4 is.  I'm almost done with it, and I've realized that some of the best characters in Jugdral were just left out!  They forgot to put in Mareeta and Galzus, forgot about Dean, Olwen never showed up, and there aren't ANY playable dark magic users.  And Sara hasn't show up either!  Or Cyas.  Man, what a hash FE4 made of Jugdral chronology, too-- the timeline in chapters 7-8-9 is just totally wrong.  I mean, you have Leaf conquering Conote with Celice and then they all go on to Manster-- how screwed up is that?

IS needs to remake this game and fix all the errors and take some of these crappy characters out and replace them with the real ones.  I mean, damn, they never even tell you what really happened to Briggid.  What a stupid detail to forget!  And it's like everyone in this game is so dumb they don't know about Linoan and think there's only one possible heir to Narga.  How could they miss that?

/trolling off

I mean, people can count, right?  


Actually, there's not a lot to say about Chapter 10.  

I'll be brief. )
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Dear IS--

In the wake of Bride!Eirika the Beauteous Staff Chick, I have the following suggestions for upcoming DLC:

Vampire Hunter!Cellica.  So what if there are no vampires in Fire Emblem?  What's stopping you?
Ninja!Lyn.  Everything goes better with ninja, right?
Pirate!Ike.  Not a Fire Emblem pirate, though it's nice that the class does exist somewhere in canon.  Like, a Pirates of the Caribbean pirate.
Mad Scientist!Sigurd.  This makes as much sense as what you did to Eirika.
Badass!Eliwood.  Make it canon, I don't care how.  Black leather is a plus.

And you don't seem to be treating Hector as a Lord, but if you did, there is one obvious choice for him: Pegasus Knight Hector.  With staves.

Please get back to me in approximately two weeks with your results.

   Mark (not that Mark)

PS: And make Soren a pink sparklegoth with Hello Kitty displayed somewhere on his clothing.
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
My hypothetical FE dream game was an Archanea/Valencia crossover that tied that whole "world" together and featured at least one mid-ocean battle with hopefully some sea dragons.  And a Pegasus Knight as the main character.

Got stiffed on the Peg Knight Lord, but still holding out hope for the ocean battle.  Come on, IS!


OK.  So, we have a teaser as to "Butterfly's" identity.

It's all very fishy. )

That's enough new-game weirdness for one day.  Here, have some old-game weirdness.  It's a pic of Finn and Lachesis dressed up as Shinji and Asuka.  It's from this Clare de Lune person's blog.

Have another FinnLache pic from Electric Flowers, while we're at it.  Safe for work and all that.  
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
OK.  So I was daydreaming away in a meeting, wondering if it would be worthwhile to write a post-FE4 story in which Leaf dies and Altenna unites Thracia.  Then Raphi sends me a link to the new trailer for FE13.

Here Be Spoilers. And WTF. )

Oh, and it's coming out in Europe.  Many, many props to Raphi for flagging this to me.

PS: I think "all-new" just meant "not a remake."
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
This is something I won't write because it'll take too long and I don't know FE6 enough, but it's occupying valuable mental space and needs to be offloaded.

Ereb: city of the modern age, astonishingly beautiful and astonishingly corrupt. Fifteen-year-old Roy, scion of a wealthy family, leads a fairly ordinary life; he goes to school, spends time with a few friends, and tries to be the "young master" while his father recovers from TB in a sanatorium. He also, in secret, reads sword-and-sorcery fantasy comics, tales of winged horses and dragons and enchanted weapons. There's nothing like that in Ereb, though a generation ago, a team of shadowy masked vigilantes beat back a crime wave and restored order to the city.

Even as Roy reads his escapist comics, a new crime wave threatens to engulf Ereb, and the source of these crimes appears to be the very highest levels of the city's political and industrial elite. With some nudging from family retainer Marcus, Roy uncovers a shocking secret. His own father Eliwood was the Blue Falcon, leader of the masked vigilantes that once saved Ereb. Will Roy manage put on his father's mask and cape and save the city? How many other secrets about Ereb's past will be revealed along the way?

So, yes. FE6 by way of Watchmen. Anyone wants to take this and run with it, please do so.
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
So, in their third and final support conversation, MyUnit tells Marth that she wants to have his babies.  Oh, wait, mistranslation.  Sorry, she says that if she has children, they will serve Marth's kids the way that Chris served Marth.  So, after the war, Chris and Katarina settle down and--

Wait.  Little problem there.  As much as I'd like to shrug this off by saying, "Chris fails biology forever," I do admit I'm intrigued by the dilemma of what a patriotic young knight is going to do when she and her partner aren't equipped with the bits to make little future knights. 

And then I find out that female!Chris has a special support network of five eligible men that male!Chris lacks.  What.

I'd say our girl Chris could teach Priscilla a thing or two. )
mark_asphodel: (Dead Heero)
Expiation: (n) an act of atonement

All right, boys and girls: I wrote a Tactician story.  Mostly to get the damned idea on the page and out of my head forever.

'Fic spoilers under the cut. )
I think that's it for now.  I feel purged of a great uncleanliness.

BTW, still no "Katarina" category on ffnet.

Play Ball

Oct. 14th, 2011 11:28 am
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
Is is wrong that I'm having to restrain myself from writing a baseball AU wherein awesome pitcher/catcher buddy duo Eliwood and Hector of the Lycian Dukes are the scrappy underdogs facing the well-heeled Magvel Royals?
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
In the unused content for FE1, there is an item called the Time Orb.  We don't know what it would've done in gameplay (as it is, it does nothing), but we can figure that it manipulated time in some way-- moving it back, perhaps, or freezing it, perhaps freezing the enemy a turn.  But that doesn't matter so much as what we might imagine became of that orb.

Speculation of the cracky variety )
mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)
In case you're stuck for ideas for [info]fe_contest, the "Pairing Game" thread over on ffnet offers a lot of crack pairings, some of which seem more plausible than you might otherwise expect.  Granted, some of the arguments presented will make you want to hit yourself with a frying pan, but hey, that's the price of a research adventure.  Right?

Anyway, Marth/Lyn is one of those things that pops up in Smash Bros fanfiction now and again, and makes me go "Bullshit" every time.  But someone today outlined the case for it as "less idealistic Eliwood" with preference for "strong women" + Lyn, to which I can only go, "Well, yeah... but..."

But I don't buy Eliwood/Lyn either, except as some kind of contingency plan.

Still sounds to me like a trainwreck, but I guess I won't laugh at it next time I see it.


OK.  Everyone pokes fun at the more unrealistic outfits in FE artwork-- Hey, Peg Knights!  Put some pants on!-- but beyond clothing that's too scanty for protection, or too flowing for safety, there's another issue the official art dodges.

Dude, if you're someone important, and you want to escape detection, you might want to "dress down" or change clothes with one of your knights.  It's a time-honored device that might keep you from getting killed.

See, there's a picture of Leaf in the 20th anniversary artbook (page 76) that depicts him meeting with Evayle. He's in regular clothes-- plain tunic, trousers, unadorned cloak.  A very good choice for someone on the run and trying to keep a low profile.  And it struck me, because it was a kind of "No shit, Sherlock" moment that canon doesn't acknowledge much.  There is a time to swan around in gilt-edged white armor and a scarlet-lined mantle and a time to NOT do that, kthx.   

Not sure who the worst offender on that count in FE canon is, but the list is pretty damned long.
mark_asphodel: (Dead Heero)
 I'm still in screw-off mode.

"Paris, you pretty boy, you woman seducer.  Why were you ever born?"

This, one of my favorite quotes in E.V. Rieu's prose translation of the Iliad, is Hector's lament over the wayward and aggravating nature of his brother, Paris.

The Trojan Hector and Paris are amusing to me because, links to Sir Ector notwithstanding, FE7's Hector is named, well, Hector.  And Ike's original name was supposed to be Paris.  And, given that Ike was modeled on Hector, that makes him, in a sense, FE7!Hector's little brother.

And since girl-crazy Paris Ike doesn't work for me, I'm now imagining Soren as Helen of Troy.

Yes, you can hit me now.


mark_asphodel: Sage King Leaf (Default)

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